Active Listening – Responding Verbally
Demonstrating that we understand what our children are saying, using verbal communication can include any of the following responses; reflecting, summarising and asking for clarification.
Reflecting is restating as near as possible what the other person has just said. It is used;
- to reassure them that we are listening
- to help them to explore their interest further – shows that we value them and therefore leads to an increase in confidence
- to check we have understood them
- to give them a chance to correct us if we haven’t understood them
- it gives us thinking time
Below are two examples of reflecting;
1. From Tennis; ‘I found that he always played it to my backhand and I didn’t have a chance to attack down the line.’
‘He always played it to your backhand which meant that you didn’t have a chance to attack down the line.’
2. From Netball; ‘I felt that Chloe ran too far ahead and I couldn’t reach her with my pass.’
‘You felt that because Chloe ran too far ahead that you couldn’t reach her with your pass.’
Furthermore, reflecting using a questioning tone at the end of the sentence can help children to explore in more depth what it is that they are talking about. For example;
‘You felt that because Chloe ran too far ahead, that you couldn’t reach her with your pass?’
‘Yeah, I knew I couldn’t reach her and that maybe I needed to stay closer to her’.
Click on video below to see some examples of reflecting;